


Golden Hour

by spideybabeparker



Category: Star Wars, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Smut, plus size, plus size reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2020-01-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:47:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22237339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spideybabeparker/pseuds/spideybabeparker
Summary: You’re trying to enjoy every moment you have with him because you don’t know how much longer things will last between you.
Relationships: poe dameron - Relationship, poe dameron x plus size, poe dameron x plus size reader, poe dameron x reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	1. digging myself down deeper

According to him you’re the moon and the stars. That you’re his guiding light home, that even when he’s in a rough mission that he needs to come home to you. From the moment you meant Poe Dameron you knew you were in trouble. No man should be that good looking, and nearly that charming. The first time you met him on a resistance base he started flirting with you the moment he introduced himself. It didn’t take long for you to fall for his charm and to end up in his bed.  
It’s been six months since you started sleeping together and things between you were still hot and heavy. You can’t seem to get enough of each other. You couldn’t lie you had fallen in love with the handsome pilot and you knew deep down inside he didn’t feel the same. You lie to yourself over and over and tell him it’s fine that he doesn’t love you, but it’s starting to eat away at your mind and your heart, and you aren’t sure how much longer this can last.  
It’s another night where he’s managed to charm his way into your bed. He’s hovering over you kissing that sweet spot on your neck he knows drives you wild. His hips are slowly rolling into yours. You have a leg hooked over his back resting right above his butt. Yours fingers are scratching at his tone back, silently begging for more. Your lips are parted as soft pants leave your lips. With each thrust he’s stretching you in the best way possible.  
Quietly you moan his name as you find your release. Crashing your lips against his you kiss him roughly to muffle your moans. You learned quite quickly that you need to keep it down when Poe joins you in bed. You didn’t need the whole base knowing about your and Poe’s “relationship”.  
He finds his own release and he collapsed against your doughy body for a moment before he rolls onto the small bed next to you. Laying on your side you rest on your elbow with your face leaning against your hand as you watch Poe come down from his high. His eyes are closed as smile plays across his face. His curled hair is slightly damp from sweat.  
Slowly his eyes open and looks over at with those beautiful dark eyes. Capturing your bottom lip between your teeth you just smile at him unsure of what to say. He just returned from a mission and came right to your room. Very little was said between you as he stripped away your clothing and his own.  
“Did you miss me?” he says.  
You can’t help but smile as you silently nod your head. You would be a complete liar if you said you didn’t miss him.  
“I missed you too,” he says as he reaches for you.  
He pulls you close to his body so your curled up right against him with your head resting on his strong chest. You close your eyes enjoying the feeling of how close you are. There is something so relaxing about hearing his heartbeat as your head rests on his chest. Your hand is rested on his tone stomach. His hand is resting on your doughy side and his calloused thumb is slowly brushing your skin.  
“I fight to come back to you,” he says softly.  
“I need you to come back to me,” you whisper. This statement is your way of saying you love him.  
You’re trying to enjoy every moment you have with him because you don’t know how much longer things will last between you. The universe is a crazy place, and you aren’t exactly sure what happened that led you to Poe, but you thank your lucky stars you met him. Even if you can’t be together forever you’re glad you get to have your time together now.  
It wasn’t long before your eyes were too heavy to stay open and you fell asleep in his arms.  
-  
When the morning comes you find yourself alone in bed. You wake up the same way you always do. Poe Dameron was a man who had no problem getting into be with you, but he could never bring himself to stay the whole night.  
The spot where Poe was laying was cold as you reached your hand out. Your stomach sank a little as you thought about him sneaking out attempting to not wake you.  
You kept trying to tell yourself that you were never meant to be together but it’s a little hard to come to terms with. How are your supposed to tell yourself things are temporary between you and the man who holds your heart?


	2. you’ve set my world on fire

Standing outside in the warm sun you watched as Poe and his crew we’re landing back at the base. The mission had been a really rough one and you heard that Poe got pretty hurt. Watching as Poe walked away from his X-Wing you noticed right away that he was limping. As he got closer you noticed that he had dried blood on his neck. Your eyes were wide as he got closer to you. 

He stops in front of you and give you at stupid signature smile that makes your heart flutter. Reaching out you rest your hand on his scruff cheek. Around the base you never really showed any affection towards each other.

“What the hell happened?” you asked trying your hardest to stay calm.

“We got ambushed at the location,” he says.

“Are you okay?” you ask as you drag your thumb gently across his bottom lip that looked swollen.

“I’ve been better,” he lets out a soft chuckle.

“Let’s get you to the med bay.”

You walk next to each other towards the bed bay. As the medics look at a very injured Poe you stand outside trying to stay calm. You’ve seen him come back injured before, but for some reason this time has you worried.

You have to walk out of the room taking deep breaths trying to stay calm. The hall feels so small as you start to pace. You seem to be lost in a haze of “what if” you know that Poe is fine that he literally walked to the med bay but you can’t help but be worried that he might have internal bleeding or something else wrong.

Someone placing a hand on your shoulder snaps you out of your thoughts. You quickly look up to see Finn standing next to you. He doesn’t seem to be nearly as concerned as you about Poe.

“Finn,” you say with wild eyes.

“Are you okay?” he asked with his hand still on your shoulder.

Slowly you nod as you look in the direction Poe is being looked at.

“He’s going to be okay. It’s going to take a lot to take down Poe,” he gives you a smile that almost melts away your fears.

“How did you know I was worried about Poe?” you ask wondering what exactly Finn knows.

“Because I’m not blind,” he smiles as he removes his hand.

Looking down at your feet you wonder how obvious your feelings are for Poe. Silently you stand there as Finn walks into the med bay to see the injured pilots from Poe’s fleet.

You stand there for a half hour before Poe walks out looking in better shape then he was. He smiles as he walks towards.

“Finn says you’re very worried about me,” he reaches out and rest his hand on your round cheek, same way you did with him earlier.

Closing your eye you take in his closeness and slowly nod.

“I thought I told you not to worry about me,” he says.

“I can’t help it.” As long as Poe Dameron is in your life you’ll always worry about him. You care too much about him to not worry.

“I need a shower,” he says.

-

Standing in the shower stall with Poe you watch as he washes away all the dried blood from his tan skin. Your eyes can’t help but focus on the bruise that’s on his side. He notices right away that you’re lost in thought. He reaches out and takes you hand pulling you closer to him. The warm water washes over you as you stand close to Poe. He holds the soap in his hand in front of you. 

“Turn around for me,” he says.

Silently you listen to him. Standing under the water with your back him you wait. Moments later you feel his strong hands start to wash your overly curvy body. He’s so gentle when it comes to you. He treats you like you’re made of glass, and after dealing with the war and seeing so much destruction it’s nice to be treated like that.

His wet body is close to yours as he starts washing your breast. His simple touch already has you aroused. Leaning back you rested your head on his shoulder. His hand starts to wander lower. You should of known there was no way this could stay an innocent shower. Things with Poe always ended one way. Leaning down he presses his lips to your temple.

Turning back so you’re facing him you wrap your arms around his neck. He looks at you with lust filled eyes. Leaning forward you press your lips to his for a soft kiss.

He spins you around he pressed you against the cool wall. You gasped at the cool contact of the metal against your skin. Pressing his lips to yours for another kiss, this one is more intense than the last.

“Doing this is the best welcome home gift,” he smirks.

“Is that so?” you the corner of your mouth turns up.

You rest both your hands on his chest and slowly start moving down his stomach. His hungry eyes stay locked on you as your hand brush his length. He starts to hardened in your hand as you slowly stroke him. 

“Look at what you do to me,” he sighs. 

Seeing how he reacts to your touch does nothing but boost your confidence. 

It’s not long before he’s putty in your hands. With each stroke he draws closer and closer to the edge. He whines your name letting you know how close he is. 

Leaning forward he presses his chapped lips to yours for a fevered kiss. He gasped with his lips to yours as you push him over the edge. Your lips part as he rest his forehead against yours. He’s hasn’t even touched you and you feel super close to the edge just by what you have done to him. 

“There isn’t a day go by that don’t thank the stars I found you,” he says before pressing his lips to your forehead. 

The butterflies once again start fluttering in your stomach at his sweet words. You know that you mean a lot to him, but not enough to be more than what this is. It hurts to think that this might not ever be more.


	3. you know we’re runnin’ out of time

Overthinking is something that seems to go hand in hand when you think about Poe Dameron. That might have something to do with the fact that he’s the first man you’ve ever loved. He makes you feel things you’ve never felt before. Your heart swells every time you see him. He brightens your day with just a smile. His touch makes you feel at home, and when your together it feels as if you’re made for each other.   
Poe joined you in bed once again. He’s leaving at sun rises for another mission and you know you don’t have much more time together.   
Shortly after he knocked on your door, it didn’t take long before he had you naked and underneath him. He knows all the right places that make you melt and all the quickest ways to have moaning his name.   
Laying your stomach with head resting on your arms. You’re lost in the feeling of Poe running his calloused fingertips up and down your spine. His touch feels as if it’s made for you.   
“Are you going to miss me?” you asks praying he’ll say yes.   
Leaning over he presses his lips to your bare shoulder before saying, “I always do.”  
“What happens when the war is over?” You asking needing to know what the future held.   
“I haven’t been able to see past this war in the longest time. I don’t even know what a normal life would consist of,” he slowly removes his hand from your skin.   
Rolling on to your side you look up at him trying to figure out what’s going on in his mind. He looks extremely conflicted by your question and you can’t lie that worries you.   
“I wonder what it would be like to have something I’m not worried about losing every single day,” you stomach twist in knots as say what’s been eating away at you.   
“I can’t think past what’s happening now,” he says.  
“I thought you said we need hope to win?” You move so you’re resting on your elbow.   
“We do need hope. It’s just sometimes easy to lose it.”  
“I don’t wanna lose hope,” your heartaches. Because this just isn’t a conversation about winning the war. This a conversation about what you want in your future.   
“(Y/N) you’re a special girl,” he moves so he’s lying on his back. You don’t bother saying anything you move so you’re curled up next to him. Your chubby body is pressed up against his. For some reason this goodbye feels different than all the rest. That’s exactly a good thing. This goodbye feels like it could be your last.   
“Are you coming back to me?” you ask.   
“I’m going to try my hardest,” he says softly.   
Your heart sinks a little that even he knows this goodbye is different.   
“What happened to that cocky pilot who charmed his way into my bed?” you look up into his dark eyes.   
“He’s trying not to lose hope,” he gives you a sad smile before pressing his lips to yours for a soft kiss.   
“Please don’t ever lose hope.”  
There is a long moment of silence as you lay there holding each other. As the sun starts to rise Poe crawls out of your and gets dressed. You lie there watching him trying your hardest to hold back your tears that keep threatening to fall. You don’t want to say goodbye. You don’t want him to leave you again.   
“Poe,” you say as he reaches for the door.   
He stops and turns and looks at you as he pushes his fingers through his curled hair, “yeah?”  
“Please come back to me,” the tears start to slide down your cheeks as you stare at the man you’re ever so desperately in love with.   
“Okay,” he says before walking out of your room.   
Laying on your bed you stare at the door wishing Poe would come back to, but that’s not realistic. You lay there for about a half hour before falling asleep.   
Your sleep is filled with dreams of your home planet and Poe being there with you. You dream of the future that can really only exist while you sleep.


	4. sunsets fade, and love does to

It’s late in the middle of the night you awake to the sound of knocking on your door. You were half awake and not even sure if someone was knocking on the door. You're dressed in nothing more than an oversized shirt and a pair of panties. The last few nights on the base had been much warmer than other ones.   
Slowly crawling out of your bed you walk over and slide open the door.   
Opening the door you’re caught off guard at the sight of Poe standing on the other side.   
“When did you get back?” You ask as you lunge forward wrapping your arms around him. You can’t seem to get to him fast enough.   
“We just arrived back at the base,” he says as he holds you tight and rubs your back. You’ve missed his touch so much.   
There’s a long moment of silence and you can tell right away something is off with Poe. Usually by now he was charming his way into your bed, and stripping away your clothes. Pulling away from him you look up at him and notice he has a conflicted look playing across his face.   
“Poe what’s wrong?”  
Resting his hand on your round cheek his dark eyes seem sad as they stare into your.   
“I’m leaving in a few hours for a while,” he pauses and stares at you.   
You can tell by his tone he’s going to be gone for a very long time. Your heart aches just thinking about it. You aren’t ready for him to leave your again. He had just returned.   
“How long are you leaving for?”   
He removes his hand from your cheek and you feel suddenly empty. Stepping away from him you know that he doesn’t have good news.   
“I don’t have a return date and I need you to do me a favor and not wait around for me.”  
You heart drops and your stomach sinks that he was finally leaving you. Your little dream life you have with Poe was crashing down around you.   
Your eyes start to brim with tears as you stare at him. You aren’t even sure what exactly you can say to him. He stares at you for a long moment before he looks away staring at the wall.   
“I’ll wait you,” you plead.   
He shakes his head and closes his eyes as if he’s fighting back tears.   
“Poe I can’t,” you start stumbling over yours words as tears stream down your face. Your mind is all over the place and you aren’t exactly sure what to even say to change his mind. Your voice is shaky as your say, “Poe why are you ending this?”   
You felt sick as tears stained your face.   
“I don’t know if I’m coming back,” he says as he reaches out wiping the tears away from your skin.   
“Why?” You reach forward grabbing into his shirt.   
“I’m going on a long mission I don’t know if I can survive it,” you takes a deep breath and you can tell he’s shaken.   
“I love you and I’m begging you to fight for me,” you hold his face in your hands as you beg him. You can’t let him just walk away from you. You love him way too much for him to end it now.   
He’s completely silent as he stares at you and know that’s because he can’t bring himself to say those three words back to you. Suddenly your heart crumbles into a million pieces. Your hands drop from his face and you just stare at him unsure of what to say. You sniffle as you try to stop the tears that keep falling. His own dark eyes are brimming with tears as he stares at you.  
You’re caught off guard as he wrapped his arms around your chubby body holding your tight against him. Your face rest in the crook of his neck as your start to sob as he holds you.   
“I’m sorry,” he whispers as he still holds your tight.   
You swallow unsure of what to say to him. It was clear he didn’t feel the same way. You would fight to the end of the universe to get back to him, but he didn’t want to fight for you.   
Pulling away from his warm embrace you look at him unable to stop crying. Reaching up you push away the tears staining your flushed cheeks.   
“I think you should leave,” it’s five of the hardest words you’ve had to say to him.   
Slowly he nods and says, “okay it’s probably for the best.”  
He walks out of your room and just like that Poe Dameron left you alone and broken hearted.


	5. we had our day in the sun

It’s been ninety-four days, and twenty hours since he walked out of your life. In those days you had gone through your fair share of night laying in bed crying yourself to sleep. How do you move on from someone who couldn’t bring themselves to say “I love you” back.   
Even though he told you not to wait around for him you can’t help by worry about him. Everyday you check with the General to see how his missions going. Last you heard he’s on an unknown planet the first order is trying to take over. The general doesn’t tell you too much information because she knows you worry.   
Sitting outside taking in the warm sun you think about his bright smile. He’s never fully left your mind since he walked away. You love him too much for him to leave your mind. You pull your knees into your chest and close your eyes taking in the warmth of the sun.  
The base is busy people constantly coming and going. Another team has just returned from a long mission, but they aren’t led by Black Leader, your pilot. It’s been so long you aren’t sure if he’ll ever return.   
You sit outside waiting until the sun starts to set before you head off to your room.  
-  
You dream of him almost nightly. He seems to captivate every moment of your existence. On day one-hundred and twelve you awake to the noise a knock on your door.   
Slowly your crawl out of bed grabbing a rub and wrapping it around your chubby body. Sliding the door open you’re shocked to see Poe standing on the other side still dressed in his uniform.  
Without even thinking you’re reach up slapping him. He left you completely and utterly heartbroken and now here he was standing at your door in the middle of the night.   
He winced at the contact and reached your rubbing his cheek, “I think it’s clear I deserved that.”  
You stare at him unsure of what to say to him. He left you broken trying to protect you.   
“How long are you back?” you ask as your eyes are starting to brim with tears.   
He reaches forward and rest his hand on your round cheek and says, “I’m not going on a long mission anytime soon.”  
“You broke my heart.”  
He nods his head and closes his eyes, “I know I should of said it back to you before I left.”  
You can’t help but smile as you look at him, “what should you have said?” You desperately need him to say those words back to you.   
“That I love you,” a smile spreads across his face as he says it.   
“Why didn’t you say it before?”   
He shrugs his shoulders and leans forward resting his forehead against yours. Wrapping your arms around him you hold on to him for dear life.   
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers.  
“Please don’t break my heart again,” you say softly leaning forward to connect your lips to his.  
“Believe me I don’t plan on it,” he takes your face in his hands again.  
Biting your bottom lip you stare at him completely lost in his dark eyes. This is the first time you’re looking at him and you don’t see the ending. In this moment it feels as if everything is a new beginning.   
Stepping away from him you sitting on the bed signalling for him to sit next to you. He slides the door shut and locks it. Sitting on the edge of the bed next to you he rest his hand on your thick thigh and looks over at you smiling. Things suddenly feel so right. All the heartbreak has faded away and felt the love you never expected to feel.   
“I love you,” he says those three sweet words that cause butterflies to flutter in your stomach.  
The corners of your mouth pulls into a smile as you stare at him. Everything felt so right in the moment.  
“I love you too,” you lean over closing the distance between you.   
Your lips move together for a long moment before Poe pulls away and moves so he’s standing in front of you. He takes your hand so you’re standing in front of him. Untying your robe he leaves you standing in front of him in nothing but your bra and panties. You watch as he works on taking off his own clothes leaving himself in nothing but his boxers. Holding his scruff covered jaw leaning forward you rest your nose against his. Your lips brush for a passion filled kiss. His hands reach behind your curvy body unhooking your bra. Pulling away you step back and your bra falls to the floor.   
Soon both your clothes are fully stripped away and you’re laying on the bed with Poe hovering over you. Your fingers are locked in his curls with his forehead resting against his. Your legs are spread wide with him resting between them as he slowly thrust into you. Your hungry hands travel down his neck and stop on his lower back. Your fingers dig into his skin wanting him as close as possible. With each thrust he pushing you closer and closer to your high.  
Soft moans leave your lips as he nuzzles his nose against your neck.  
“My sweet girl,” he mumbles against your skin.  
“I love you,” you whimper.  
“I love you too,” he groans pulling his nose away from your skin.   
As you reach your he follows right behind you. He lays down on your bed next to you and he pulls you close to his body. Your head rests on his chest and he presses his lips to the top of your head.  
“I”m going to give you everything,” he whispers as his hand gently rubs your side.  
“Please do,” you say as you start to drift off to sleep.  
You fall asleep in the man you love arms knowing that he feels the same way you do. It’s the best sleep you’ve ever had. You didn’t dream about what could be, you just dreamt about him holding you. You dreamt about what your life now holds. You awoke to him in bed just where you left him and suddenly everything felt perfect.


End file.
